A sadness awakens my spirit...I feel like I've lost you...
Although I can still feel your breath as if you are trying to tell me something...

No matter what you might have to say...trust in me enough to know I can handle it..be what it may.

Amazing you are..but I've only known you from afar.. Don't misunderstand my words...without you in my life, I'd be lost...Though my heart will, as always fully mend..

My dream for the future is to hold you through the night...to look into your face, until it is no longer young...To look forward to the day my name is unfamiliar to those who know me best...

To have the question from time to time.."where's your other half?" when I am out walking alone..

With my spirit now wide awake and this heavy on my heart...Never will my happiness fall apart..for everything happens for a reason... but, with my hands folded I pray...you in my life your will forever stay...

shh.. Please don't tell him.. I LOVE HIM!!

Shhhhh….Please don’t tell him… that I love him

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I was just minding my own business when along came a distraction, I was only hiding from.. a year had gone by and I was just fine with the thoughts of me, myself, and I for the rest of my days..

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For some reason, I was drawn to this person, can’t explain why, I just was… found myself finding silly reasons to let him know I was there.. from, leaving notes “hi have a good day,” to “Happy Easter, hope you and yours has a great one” not really expecting replies, just putting my self out there… come to find out.. he had been doing the same thing…”Hey girl, what’s up?” “Come out and see us” Etc. Etc….

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Still I thought I was just going to let this person know I was there, and then…that would be it… turns out.. this person, I was reaching out to, was coming closer and closer into my life, and instead of fighting it…I just went with it, not just because but it felt like it was meant to be but because, it was like I was being pulled by a force, that knew something I did not!…also he made me feel like I have never felt in my whole life…

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Every day that passes, I wonder if I am going to be the girl, he wants to spend the rest of his life with….Is this too good to be true.. this one..??? A sweet Dream, or a beautiful Nightmare? I find my self dreaming often, of the way it will turn out.. the wonderful dreams are amazing… he and I having breakfast together out on the patio, or on a trip for a anniversary, celebrating a many beautiful years together.. but there are times where I wake up in the night,…from a nightmare… trying to shake it.. where he’d would be saying something similar to… I have to let you go baby!!

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This is a long distance relationship, and I cannot tell you just how faithful I am, and can be… I always pretend, he is just out of town for something to do with his business, that makes it so much easier…When He comes to visit me, I act as if he is finally home, and all I want to do is hold him, look into his eyes, and try not to cry, because I know I only have a few short hours with the man that has taken my heart…

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The man that has taken my heart happens to be strong willed and has his mind on his dream.. and I want to be all the support he could ever ask for, and when his dream comes true, and there is a painted picture.. I want my fingerprints of love all over it…. Not for any reason… but to be the woman that stood behind him, whispering encouraging words into his ear… “This dream belongs to you baby…go get it!~ “

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I have a tattoo on my heart with his name on it.. and I want him to see it more than I have wanted anything in my life!! But, with the fear of this is too soon, makes me hold it that much longer... The words.. I love you baby… are at the tip of my tongue on a daily bases, every single time I think of his name.. but.. I am scared those words will be too much for his sweet ears… Someone asked me if I was falling in love… and I said… what do you mean… ? Falling??? I fell a long time ago.. But the difference with me.. is.. I have all the patience in the world to see where this goes… the most amazing man has come into my life, and I want what was suppose to be… to be.. not what I want it to be…

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So if you see my sweet baby walking by… shhhhh.. please don’t tell him.. I love him!!!

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*~*Tammy Martina*~*